Posted by
Anjali Kaur
on
Feb 05, 2022
My Mother-in-law
I always read a great post on mothers, but never saw many or any great posts on mother-in-law. In this post, I would like to write about my mother, who accepted me as her own daughter after I married his son.
Honeymoon Phase
After marriage, the initial couple of years is like the honeymoon phase. You don’t really get to know each one of your family members that much. It’s all like a fairy tale(exceptions are always there), you eat, you shop, you get lots of money in the form of blessings. You don’t get much involved, and it’s all laughter and butterflies in the tummy. Of course, we gain a lot of weight as well(again exceptions are there).
Initial Stages
It all starts after 2 years or more of marriage when some misunderstandings start to originate. You judge and you blame and you cry. See, everyone thinks in their head that they are right and the other person is so much wrong. That’s called being human. We always consider ourselves as superior to the other person. That’s okay, it’s life. Everyone thinks that way and everyone portrays themselves as Cindrella at some point in their life.
Relatives
Most of the quarrels start when the third party starts interfering in your family. It is always the third person who will cause a feud, by saying in our home that is not done this way and how she can do this to you. This is the stage where most marriages start having troubles. Of course, we always think that we are right and the other person is torturing us emotionally. That’s okay, it is a stage and it shall pass away. When? Well, as you grow up and realize that you don’t have to take everything seriously on your own self always. Remember: Ignorance is bliss.
The Spouse
It is all dependent on the husband and wife, how they are going to keep their relationship strong. They have to act as a pillar of strength, else it doesn’t work easily. You may stall for a while, but unless you both start accepting, mending, and ignoring each other flaws, it is going to be a very tough and painful journey. It’s important that both the people accept and apologize whenever required. Don’t be ashamed of using the sorry word. This word will help you grow stronger and smarter.
Half a decade
It’s only after spending 5 years with each other family relatives and with accepting each other negatives, you can say it’s a success(again ignoring exceptions). How my mother-in-law and I had shared that time?
Let’s focus on that topic now.
Acceptance
My mother in law, accepted me because my husband liked me. No questions asked. I Met my mother-in-law on the day of our Rauka ceremony. This shows she had full faith in his son’s choice. I have realized this thing after years of marriage. Of course, I also accepted the family without meeting them, this shows my full faith in him.
Proud
My mother-in-law is so much fond of getting herself and her daughters-in-law in good attires. She feels proud, that is amazing. She used to pack my lunch for my office. She never ever till date forced me to enter the kitchen. That doesn’t mean, I didn’t. But I can say that she never made me do anything with force.
Skills
My mother-in-law is a great driver. So, she made me learn all the skills she possessed. I learned cycling after marriage. Yes, my parents never taught me ‘How to ride a bicycle? My husband taught me, cycling in the local park so that I can learn scooter and be independent to go to work. Yes, I learned scooter after marriage only.
No judgement
My mother-in-law never judged me. She also taught me how to drive a car. I learned car driving from her in 90 days. She is not at all materialistic. I drove her car and bumped twice, we had to pay a 10k fine to the neighbors, because I bumped into his car. Even then, she never judged me. She uses this phrase a lot “take it easy”.
Who is better?
Of course, no question asked. I have never met a person like hers, ever. She is so much selfless and she never argues. Of course, we had our ups and downs. But 1 thing I can say, is she is beyond imagination. I can never be like her, she is like Mother Teresa. Or sometimes I feel, she is like a God in human form. Do you know why? Above written words are nothing. She single-handedly raised 2 amazing boys, who are perfect gentlemen(1 is mine).
Not only that, she helps so many people, whether strangers or anyone. She is such a giving person, and I truly have never met anyone like hers.
To have known such an amazing person, in itself is a blessing. I do try to imitate her as much as possible, but then again I couldn’t do to such an extent, to be so much generous and selfless is difficult because to some extent I value material, but she doesn’t. I wish at least I could have her one quality: which is “Never letting anyone else harsh words, change my mood or behavior towards that person”. This skill is so much difficult. Because we always judge others and think, if she will help me or tell me, then only I will help her. She believes in giving selflessly. Generally, we all believe in giving or taking behavior. But yes, I definitely try my level best to gain that wisdom from her.
My mother-in-law is the best mother and nobody can replace her. I love her and respect her with a full heart. Blessed to be in her shadow. I really do not have enough words in her praise. All I can say is that I wish her health, happiness, and longevity. Do not want to miss a chance to write about the person, who herself is so much inspirational.
Thank You and I hope you can relate some aspects in your own life.
Take a look at some of my other blogging inspirations.
I totally agree with you. Lucky to have her and her blessings with us. Beautiful post written. Well done. Wish you all the best for the new beginning. God bless you all. We all are lucky to have you in our family.